From Glory to Glory

Fall has officially arrived. Fall is my season, I love so much about it. It is a time of change, a closing if you will. The last hurrah before giving way to frost, snow and freezing temperatures.

This year it symbolizes the closing of a chapter (a big chapter) in my life. A new marriage that failed and failed horribly. At times, I thought I was going to die. Perhaps not in a literal sense, but the pain of this loss was harsh and relentless. Nothing about it made much sense. I found myself questioning myself about a great many things. Fast forward...

I wrote that a year ago, it remained sitting silent in my drafts all this time. Now, it's Fall again. Last Fall brought a freak snow storm that broke trees and power lines and put countless numbers of people without power for days and in some cases weeks. This season seems to be as it should be, the colors are beginning to burst. This isn't really news though...it's really not about the season at all.

All that pain I mentioned earlier wasn't quite finished. But now, now it's all so different. I'm actually thankful my marriage dissolved. I realized had I stayed in this marriage by now I would have had no sense of self-worth because I would have been reminded constantly how little I really meant. How low my value as a woman, a human was. At least to my ex.

Enters God. Crying my heart out to God after being abandoned, after feeling my own smallness, realizing how alone I had really been I had no one to go to but God. How thankful I now am for this. Through this experience I learned how really close to me God was. Because of Christ my God and I can talk almost face to face. He allowed all my layers to be peeled back, leaving me so vulnerable and exposed. It was through this undressing I could feel God holding me, hovering over me and protecting me. Hiding me under the shelter of his wings.

Things are far from perfect, I still have a lot of work to do on myself, but the good news is I am not the one doing the work. I just have to be open to allow God to bring about the changes in me to restore me to His purpose. It is not without pain, sometimes honesty that cuts like a knife. Though always a healing touch, a Holy Spirit whisper of deep personal healing. Even though I do not see my wholeness completely, I know in Him I am whole.

Sometimes, we just have to throw all trust issues aside and just allow God to do His work in us. Christ is faithful to complete what He has begun in us. I have learned God is faithful in ALL seasons. Knowing this is worth all the loss, all the pain. The word is truth when it says, weeping my endure for a night but joy comes in the morning.

I can see the sun beginning to kiss the morning horizon.